ohyoutwat

officialunitedstates:

tinyvampire:

officialunitedstates:

I like ordering the most expensive thing on the menu but refusing to eat it.  It’s okay, though, because it’s a metaphor.  The metaphor is I’m incredibly wasteful and extremely wealthy.

OMFG HE’S DYING OF CANCER LET HIM DO WHATEVER THE FUCK HE WANTS WITH HIS DAMN CIGARETTES

what are you talking about.  im trying to brag about how ridiculously rich i am

im-louis-tomlinson

AU where Robin and Barney unexpectedly become parents. Robin’s worried this pregnancy will kill her future as a foreign correspondant, but hey! a woman’s allowed to have both a career and a family, so they take the kid with them and travel anyway. It’s not easy but Barney’s there to help (he’s writing the updated version of the Bro Code anyway, it became a great hit), and their daughter ends up speaking four languages by the time she’s five. They’d spent years worrying their respective fathers had messed them up too badly to make them good parents, but when their teenage daughter hugs them in 2030, thanking them for everything they’ve done for her, they finally understand they couldn’t have been more wrong.

rustykins
save-me-from-this-hell-i-live-in:

shitshilarious:

iliveinmattsmithspants:

territorialcreep:

itseasytoremember:

whythefuckareyouromeo:


0ver-doze:

omg they are so offended if you lick them back. 

Fun fact! Dogs lick the mouths of those they consider higher in rank! So if you lick them back, they are not offended, they just don’t see themselves as higher than you and they are confused! The second dog must be a very loyal dog because he or she literally refuses to be licked back haha! I love dogs.

i started reading that expecting an angry rant and it turned out to be one of the nicest things ever.

I have reblogged this like ten times

My cat grooms me. What does that mean?

It means your cat thinks your style is wack and is trying to help


My dog does this so much aww

save-me-from-this-hell-i-live-in:

shitshilarious:

iliveinmattsmithspants:

territorialcreep:

itseasytoremember:

whythefuckareyouromeo:


0ver-doze
:

image

omg they are so offended if you lick them back. 

Fun fact! Dogs lick the mouths of those they consider higher in rank! So if you lick them back, they are not offended, they just don’t see themselves as higher than you and they are confused! The second dog must be a very loyal dog because he or she literally refuses to be licked back haha! I love dogs.

i started reading that expecting an angry rant and it turned out to be one of the nicest things ever.

I have reblogged this like ten times

My cat grooms me. What does that mean?

It means your cat thinks your style is wack and is trying to help

My dog does this so much aww

ha-ze
bullshit394:

thernediocregatsby:

darkfather-ihavesinned:

stfunadeen:

hisan-na:


orientaltiger:
Fill your heart with secrets but the only way to read them is if you break your heart. 

i will forever reblog this

i need me one of these.

OMG I WANT ONE

i think every couple should get one and fill it with the little things they love about each other. and then if they’re fighting throw it at a wall and read all the little things that come out and hopefully that will remind them to love again. 

asdfghjkl reblogging for that ^

bullshit394:

thernediocregatsby:

darkfather-ihavesinned:

stfunadeen:

hisan-na:

orientaltiger:

Fill your heart with secrets but the only way to read them is if you break your heart. 

i will forever reblog this

i need me one of these.

OMG I WANT ONE

i think every couple should get one and fill it with the little things they love about each other. and then if they’re fighting throw it at a wall and read all the little things that come out and hopefully that will remind them to love again. 

asdfghjkl reblogging for that ^